English Summer, I prithee, weep until the Fall.

English Summer has begun, as one would expect.

A veil of rainfall.

Rain and cold winds have been the mornings thus far.

And I am enjoying it.

Many people associate the rain with negativity, despair and depression, such emotions as those. I feel very differently, I personally love the way the rain falls, how soothing it sounds when the ground is struck by countless drops of water descending from the heavens, or how lovely the scent of soaked grass and trees smell in the rain, the distant fog that is inevitable during a downpour, it almost feels poetic.

Perhaps it is a reflection of an inner turmoil? I care little about why I enjoy it so much, I just do. It is an instinct that I relish, to behold the rainfall and be glad that it comes. Especially as my body tends to generate a considerable amount of heat, making -anything- cold pleasant for me to feel!

A colleague has told me that he would have sex with me! In a joking way, of course (He is straight & engaged to a lady I knew at School) but I could not help but internally bite my lip at the thought of it. I am not particularly... 'Into' him, but it does not change the fact that the idea of someone wanting to be intimate with me is a seriously hot thought. :3

What? I am not dirty minded: I have a sexy imagination.

So far the week has been tolerable, nothing particularly intimidating, dauntless or otherwise troublesome has arisen, so here I hope that the rest of the week stays that way!

I do find myself getting a few Not-Safe-For-Work thoughts here and there though, I can look at something and consider methods on how to use it in a physically intimate fashion... As I said, sexy imagination. Yes. That~!

I do get a little jealous however. Everybody around me is not single, no it is not a matter of jealous that they are not available, but simply that fact that they have somebody. Sure, there are some people online who I absolutely adore, I have two wonderful ladies whose conversations often make my day with a Cheshire smile, and there is of course my ♥ Bae ♥. Yet those are through the Internet. Affectionate as some conversations can be, and as afraid of people as I am in the Real World... A part of me longs to hold somebody close.

A very contradictory life I lead. Subconsciously I wish to be with some cute guy, to snuggle and watch movies with, to kiss and be kissed with words of admiration, genuinely learn of their day everyday and praise their good work, or comfort them through bad days. Yet, my life would never allow that. I almost never go out and socialize: I have no interest in the trends of what social life considers 'normal', I do not know anybody who I would really want to get to know better, I am afraid of crowds of no less than ten people, even that would terrify me. So I wish for something that I know will likely never happen.

It is not all doom and gloom in that respect, I have my puppy to snuggle with. And my teddy bear. ♥

My ginger streaks have also started showing. Whenever my stubble begins to grow thick, it turns partially ginger for some reason. Being 'half-ginger' as I call it, I cannot help but focus on them whenever I gaze into a mirror... Before they are shaved away, that is.

In truth I would love to remove all of my body hair, except for my head. I need that for warmth. And maybe styling up, if I found a cutie to do it!

Ladies are so lucky. They get to wear such incredibly cute clothes. If guys wore girl clothes they get socially doomed forever. :c

High-heels for boys please. And for size 17 shoes, that is my size. Bigfoot. Q _ Q

At least boys can get a 'Male Make-up Kit'. Like there really needs to be a distinction, but such is the norm of society. I have never worn makeup myself, but damn it all, I really would like to try it. The problem for all of these desires is my family finding out... And I live in a house of five. Mother, Step-Father, myself, my younger sister and her boyfriend. Perhaps one day, if I find someone sweet and cute, they can put makeup on me and then kiss it all away~ ♥